Over decades of rapid change in lifestyles the family structure has undergone changes which challenges us to sustain strong family bonds in a modernised world.

The basis of any healthy relationship is TRUST.  When there is a lack of trust it adds to self-doubt, unmet expectations and second guessing each other.  Trust allows for an atmosphere of safety which is a healthy environment for honest, authentic conversations.  Trust removes the element of feeling judged and its in such an atmosphere that there is a feeling of mutual respect and growth. Such a level of security implies that instead of looking for a listener outside the safety net of the home, one will naturally be drawn towards the inner circle of family and reach out for help.

Very often as a family we tend to live past each other – each one absorbed in their own priorities and schedules.  Each one rushing and there not being enough time.  Often the misunderstanding is that we need a lot of time.  However its quality not quantity, its about being fully present and listening.

Like the fingers of the same hand being different, hence each one has a particular strength and weakness.  As a family each member is different and unique.  Family is about these individual personalities finding common ground in the values they share.  What enables there to be harmony in spite of the variety and the difference is the vision each one holds for the other.  Conflict usually occurs when we trying to create a single mould into which each one needs to fit in.  But when there is acceptance of the uniqueness of the other we can use the difference as a strength.  This brings harmony.  At a spiritual level it relates to seeing the other as a soul, a spiritual being who has been gifted with qualities from the Divine.  This vision instils a deep and profound respect.

Our social conditioning plays a huge role whereby each one assumes roles based on cultural influences.  Todays society in many ways challenges these traditional roles, because our current time requires both genders to contribute to both earning financially but also household chores.  Unless we adapt to these changing roles with a keen sense of appreciation of each ones contribution there can be conflict. Conflict usually occurs because of power based on the ego and the need for control.  It comes back to trust, where there is trust there is no need for ego.  Differences need to be communicated but with understanding and love.  Often there is a dance we need to learn between humility and self-respect to navigate this.

Finally the invasion of social-media and with the advent of AI, family bonds seem unimportant and something which can be avoided in comparison to the thousands of virtual friendships and array of followers lined up which makes up for all the needs of companionship. The age-old saying that man is a social animal has slowly but rapidly transformed into man is a virtual prisoner.

We crave connection, because connection is what makes us feel valued.  Virtual connections give a temporary high – however it is often just fake.  Real connections occur when we are together.  It is a very widely spoken about fact that a family that eats together and prays together stays strong together. When a family sits together for meals, firstly each one is giving a slice of their time into the joint project called “family” and as we all know that money may come and go but time once gone can never come back. Meal times are an opportunity to share the dramas of each ones day – allowing for a shared feeling of belonging.  Similarly, when we pray together, we are combining our individual energies and linking with the Supreme energy whom we refer to as God or Almighty. Such combined remembrance of God fills each one with Love, Joy, Peace, Wisdom and Purity and these positive virtues ignited in each one will fill the home with a nurturing energy which will sustain harmony and peace.

The golden rule for creating and sustaining harmony among family members respect and love without any judgement or pre-conceived notions. Spend quality time with each other enriching each one. Harmony stems from a deep, unconditional affection. This love is the first type of love a person experiences and is essential for emotional well-being, providing a foundation of security and support.

1.5 cups warm water
3 tbsp sugar
3 tbsp oil
1 pkt instant yeast
4 cups flour (faryali flour Gluten-free)
2 tsp salt
A handful of sundried tomatoes
A handful of olives
Nutritional yeast flakes

Method :

Take the warm water and add yeast to it. Let it sit for a few mins till it’s frothy. Then add sugar, oil, salt, and flour. Knead the dough well.

Once risen roll out lightly with your hands, and sprinkle the sundried tomatoes, olives

And nutritional yeast flakes. Roll like a Swiss roll and then flatten it again for the second rise.

After about 30 mins bake in the oven at 180 degrees for about 40 mins till it is fully baked. ( Tip if you knock it, it will create a hollow sound.  This will tell you that it is fully baked inside.)

1 tablespoon jeera seeds
About 8 curry leaves
1 green chilly seeded and chopped
3 tablespoons ghee or oil
2 carrots grated
2 tomatoes finely chopped
2 small potatoes cubed and boiled
½ cup raw peanuts
3 cups of (Tapioca) sago, soaked in cold water for an hour
2 tbsp lemon juice
Salt to taste
1 tbsp sugar

Method:

Take 3 tbsp ghee in a nonstick pan and saute the raw peanuts until golden brown.

Then add carrots, tomatoes, and potatoes and cook for 2 minutes

Then add cumin seeds, curry leaves, and green chili. Cook for another 2 mins.

Add salt, sugar, and lemon juice. Switch the stove odd.

Then add the soaked sago, after draining all the water out. Give it all a nice mix. ( Tip: soak the sago for 3-4 hours in cold water, enough water just to cover it.)

Garnish with coriander and serve with yogurt (Optional)

200gr red lentils
120 ml water
½ tsp salt
2 tbsp oil
1 heaped tsp baking powder
2 tbsp psylium husk (30ml)
2 tbsp chia seeds
1 tbsp sesame seeds 

Method:

Soak lentils in water overnight (or for 4 hours)

Drain and add to blender plus 120 ml water. Blend well.

Add all other ingredients and mix thoroughly.

Leave to stand for 30mins.

Form into a long loaf and place onto baking paper.

Sprinkle seeds of choice on top.

Bake at 200 C for 50 mins.

Leave to cool completely before slicing

3 Bunches of curly kale
1 cup soaked cashew nuts
1 cup red bell pepper
4 tablespoons olive oil
Lemon juice
1 tablespoon fresh thyme
1/2cup water

Seasoning:

2 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoon hing
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper

Method:

Wash the kale thoroughly.

Cut out the veins.

Marinate in the sauce.

Place in oven at high temperature and then switch off the oven and let it crisp dry in the oven.

Dal soaking time: 5 hours

Preparation time : 10 mins

Cooking time: 1 hour

Yield: Enough for 4 -6 persons

Ingredients:

1 cup (250 ml) green split peas

1 teaspoon (5ml) minced fresh ginger

1 small hot green chili, seeded and minced

6 cups (1.5ltrs) water

1 teaspoon (5ml) turmeric

2 teaspoons (10ml) ground coriander

1 small bunch of spinach, washed thoroughly and roughly chopped

1 & ½ teaspoons (7ml) salt

1 cup (250 ml) coconut milk

2 tablespoons (40 ml) ghee or oil

1 & 1/4^th teaspoons (1ml) yellow asafoetida powder

1 teaspoon (5ml) fresh lemon or lemon juice

Method :

• Wash and drain the split peas. Soak in cold water for 5 hours.
• Boil the ginger, chili, water, turmeric, coriander, and split peas in a heavy 3 liter/quart saucepan over moderate heat. Simmer for about 50 minutes or until dal is soft. Stir occasionally.
• Add the chopped spinach to the dal. When the spinach is soft and the dal is smooth, add the salt and coconut milk and return the soup to a simmer.
• Prepare the final zesty seasoning as follows: Heat the ghee or oil in a small pan. Saute the asafoetida momentarily. Add the spices to the soup, mix well, and allow the spices to blend for a few minutes. Add fresh lemon or lime juice. Serve hot.

Raja Yoga for breath

The word Yoga is derived from the Sanskrit root ‘Yuj’ meaning to join or to yoke or to unite.  As per yogic scriptures the practice of Yoga leads to the union of individual consciousness with that of Universal Consciousness, indicating a perfect harmony between the mind and body, between man and nature.

We focus on exercises as yoga, however, it is the union or rather harmonizing of matter which is body and spirit or consciousness.  In many ways humanity, with the influence of materialism, has become disconnected from the inner self, the spiritual self. This disconnect has resulted in internal conflicts and discontentment in everyday life, which gets exasperated by the continuous change in our external world.  That is one reason why we are finding how this discord and conflict is being revealed through our bodies.

We all know that mental stress leads to lowering of our immunity and a varied number of other psychosomatic illnesses. That is why yoga is so relevant in today’s day and age – we need to realign and harmonize internally first so that we can then harmonize with our world.

The various asanas of yoga are helpful to relax and center oneself; however, an internal alignment can only truly occur when we understand and give time to reconnect with our spiritual nature.  This is the alignment of our mind and intellect with our innate qualities or inherent divinity of the soul – the attributes of peace, love, bliss, purity and power.  This is Raja Yoga – to realign with this inherent self.

So, it begins by firstly recognizing and understanding that the true nature of the self is non-physical.  I am consciousness, I am soul, and the soul is eternal.  Perhaps we have this as an understanding but we have to translate this into an experience and further into an attitude so that I view my world and I respond to my world from this premise that I am a soul.  When I come from soul consciousness, I come from the awareness of being eternal, of being energy, of being divinely created – so it results in me creating a capacity within me or attitude within me to respond from a place of love and peace.  Why?  When I truly connect with myself as being eternal I am secure and I free myself from the most basic fear, the fear of death.  This internal security, this internal peace, this internal attitude of focusing on what is beyond the stream of constant change emerges two powerful personality traits. Firstly, I build the capacity to be stable emotionally and mentally irrespective of the change around me.  Secondly, it helps to engage with others with the attitude and understanding that the innate nature of every soul is goodness.  So a spirit of love and respect for all emerges, not only for people but also for nature and all creatures. When love emerges then love creates a feeling of connection and harmony.

How to begin this practice?

Just as when we are unwell we end up breathing in a shallow way, sometimes gasping for breath – in the same way, a mind that is too busy and has far too many thoughts is a soul gasping for inner peace. How do we create silence in the mind?  Silence is not emptiness, but silence is a mind resting on a pure thought.

Extract: the Man who loved angels by Anthony Strano.

A second is the unit of time, just as a thought is the basic unit of consciousness.  A body has many cells and so do time and consciousness.  Whether we measure time in terms of eternity, ages, cycles centuries years…hours minutes, the basic unit or cell is a second.  We may measure consciousness in terms of awareness, attitudes, beliefs, feelings, behaviour, aliveness, responses but the basic unit or cell is always a thought.  If these basic units of time and thoughts are weak then the whole of time and consciousness suffers.  So how do we create inner silence, we begin by a practice of taking one thought in one second and make them work together.

Take one second to think one thought

Slowly and faithfully think: I am

Add another second and another thought: a soul

Add another second or two and think: I am peace

Add another second or two and think: I am a being of peace.

Repeat these thoughts gently to yourself, paying special attention to them.  There is no need to rush, no need for second thoughts or ideas going anywhere else.  Just focus on the original self.

Practising this daily several times, we teach ourselves to think the right thoughts at the right time.  We free ourselves from the internal chatter and begin to feel more, listen more and be more.  As we reconnect with ourselves we harmonize mind with breath, spirit with body, consciousness with nature.  When I am aligned internally I can easily harmonize and connect with others and nature, but moreover, I open myself to connect with the Divine Source, with God.  This allows me to draw spiritual power and truly experience the state of Yoga – which is Union with the Highest Source.  The experience of this highest love then flows through my being, my relationships, my work and I become an instrument to create a better world.

Author: Pratiba Daya

Dear friends

Greetings of peace.

During this time of intense violence and chaos in SA, it is of utmost importance that we remain calm and draw on our spiritual resources to keep a balanced perspective and elevated mindset.

As there is growing fear of personal safety as well as that of loved ones, we can understandably feel overwhelmed and anxious.   Now is the time to draw on the teaching that we are souls, all deeply interconnected and belonging to one spiritual Parent.  Seeing each other as souls is an important reminder that the true nature of every soul is goodness and that the acts of violence we are seeing is contrary to this.  Violence in any form goes against the true nature of all souls, and leads to pain and suffering.  However, we must not allow our judgement of this to diminish the vision of soul consciousness and the potential for goodness to emerge.

It is a defining moment now, for all of us to contribute by remaining calm, generating vibrations of peace and offering assistance wherever possible.  The power of elevated thought, attitude of compassion and peace is always more impactful than anger,  hate or despair.  Let us unite with this pure intention and take support from the Divine Source to guide and empower us, so that we can navigate through this time with peace and dignity for all life. Always remember we are more powerful than any challenge we have faced and collectively we will see through this with courage.

Yours in peace

The Brahma Kumaris